I'm not sure exactly where to begin this post, so I'm just going to start. I really don't want to post a status on facebook that said that I had a miscarriage so I will just explain everything here.
Last Thursday moring Josh and I went to the "big ultrasound" to find out the sex of our baby. We were sadly told that our baby had passed away. I was 19 weeks pregnant. Since I was so far along we had no choice but to induce labor. Friday evening at 11:15 we delivered a son. We named him Tytus Ray.
A week has passed and while my body is healing, I'm not sure about my heart. I know that it will take time and I am so very blessed to have such a strong support system. It is so weird for your heart to be so full and empty at the same time.
9 comments:
Oh my Jennifer. I am so very, very sorry. I cannot fathom your feelings right now. I am so sorry. I know we rarely talk, but you and your family are in my prayers. I went through a similar situation a few years ago so if you ever need to talk, please contact me. I will be praying for your healing in this.
Christina Holmes
I know that saying this won't help fill the empty space but I feel like I should say it anyway. I've been so worried about what to say. I'm so sorry this had to happen. I truly think of you as my sister and I hate that you've had to go through all this. I love you like a sister and I'm here for you no matter what you need.
Jennifer-
I'm praying for you guys. A friend of mine found comfort in this poem.
I wanted to share it with you.
"Daddy please don't look so sad,momma please don't cry.
Cause I'm in the arms of Jesus, and he sings me lullabies.
Please try not to question God, don't think he is unkind.
Don't think he sent me to you and then changed his mind.
You see I'm a special child, I am needed up above.
I'm the special gift you gave Him, a product of your love.
I'll always be there with you, so watch the sky at night.
Look for the brightest star and know that's my halo's brilliant light.
You'll see me in the morning frost that mists your window pane.
That's me in the summer showers, I'll be dancing in the rain.
When you feel a gentle breeze from a gentle wind that blows,
Know that it's me planting a kiss upon your nose.
When you see a child playing and your heart feels a tug,
Don't be sad mommy, that's just me giving your heart a hug.
So daddy don't look so sad and momma please don't cry.
I'm in the arms of Jesus and he sings me lullabies!"
Jennifer, like everyone else, I don't know what to say.. So, I am going to say exactly what I am thinking... This just sucks. I hate that word, but I think it describes this.
If you need anything, please let me know. I am home everyday and would love to help out.
Matt, Katie, and I have been praying for you and Josh every night.
I am so sorry about your loss. I wish there was more I could say or do to help. Please let me know if we can do anything for you. We are praying for you and Josh daily.
I read this tonight and I sat and cried for you. Jeremey and I are so sorry about your loss. I pray that your body will continue to heal as well as your hearts.
Oh, Jennifer. We are so sorry for your loss. Tytus will always be an important member of your family. The comforting truth is that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, you can be with your baby boy again some day. I pray you find comfort in our Savior during the dark and lonely times. We lost a baby at 11 weeks and prayer was our lifeline. That doesn't make dealing with this any more pleasant, but it makes healing a possibility rather than a dream. We are praying for your family. Please let me know if you need anything or want to talk. Though I suspect you would turn more readily to someone in AR to whom you can lean on or have a shoulder on which to cry. I wish I could be there physically for you. I hope you find your support around you.
Jen ..I am so sorry to hear about your loss... praying for you and your family at this sad time...please know if there is anything you need to just ask..love ...Sandie
I know there is nothing anyone can say that can heal the pain you are feeling but just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you guys.
Peevy
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