A Long 9 Months

The excitement of finding out I was pregnant was short lived. The fear quickly kicked in and I was a nervous wreck. I called my clinic to make an appointment and went in the next day for the routine pregnancy test. The nurse called my name and when we started walking down the hallway she told me that all the rooms were full so we would just go in the ultrasound room so she could go over all the prenatal information. My stomach flipped...the last time I was in that room I had found out Tytus had passed. As soon as we walked in the room I lost it. The nurse was so kind and just hugged me. She told me that things were going to be different this time. I wanted to believe her so bad but I was full of doubt.

My first appointment with the doctor was the following Monday. I saw the same doctor that I saw with Tytus. Although she was so great during the miscarriage, she was not what I needed this time around. She was very "matter of fact" and was not reassuring at all. She told me that IF I made it to the second trimester, I would need to see a specialist in Little Rock. WHAT! She had told me before that the miscarriage was a fluke..a "one in a million" chance...just bad luck. While I am sure she was just covering herself by wanting me to see a specialist, I left that appointment with even more worry than before. My mom had mentioned maybe switching clinics and after that appointment, I knew I had to. I couldn't keep going to that place. Just walking in there brought up way too many emotions. I know I was probably being overly dramatic, but switching clinics ended up being the best thing for me.

I switched clinics the following month and I am so glad that I did. They were so patient with me and very reassuring. They saw no reason at all to see a specialist and instead scheduled an amnio for the following month.

The amnio went great. I made sure not to read up too much on the internet because I knew I would freak myself out. The test went great...honestly I was more worried about the ultrasound. It would be the first time I would see the baby after the 14 week mark (which is when they think I lost Tytus). After I saw a beating heart, I was fine. The test didn't hurt at all and I was sent home on bedrest for the rest of the day. Now the hard part began...a LONG two week wait. I left two days later to go to a workshop in Searcy, Arkansas which was a good distraction.

I finally got the results two and a half weeks later. All I wanted to hear was that the baby was healthy. I will never forget the phone call. I was home by myself and I was laying on the bed watching The View. I answered and the nurse gave me the good news that everyhthing looked great. I know it sounds cliche, but I felt a huge burden lifted off my shoulders. I was crying like crazy and I almost didn't hear the nurse ask if I wanted to know the sex of the baby (the amnio can tell the sex with 99.9% accuracy). Of course I said yes and she told me that we would be having a baby girl. I don't even remember hanging up the phone. The crying had turned into complete sobbing. I just remember thanking God over and over again. Once I finally got myself together I tried to call Josh (he was coaching volleyball practice). He knew the results would be in soon so he PROMISED he would answer. Well, of course he didn't hear the phone. I tried my mom next...no answer. Then my sister...no answer. I was going crazy!! Finally everyone called me back and I shared the great news. I couldn't believe that I was having a girl. I guess I just assumed it would be a boy. Josh and I would have been excited either way, but something about having a girl made this pregnancy seem totally different.

The school year started and the pregnancy continued to go great. When I was pregnant with Tytus, I had a lot of problems with protein my urine. This time I did not have that problem. The baby was growing great, I was not sick at all, my weight gain was great, no heartburn...it was over all a great experience. I am so glad that everything went smoothly because I was a nervous wreck the entire time. Even though I was told over and over again that everything was fine and going great, I still couldn't let myself be 100% excited until she was here.

My due date was January 6th, but Ellie Faith had plans of her own...(birth story up next)